Reports from the Kremlin are that Vlad Putin is overjoyed at trump's narrow electoral college win.
"I shocked the world!" Putin crowed "I am the reason that so many uneducated Americans voted for this idiot."
A reporter asked Putin why he would want such an obvious moron to run the American Presidency.
Putin chuckled. "He will end capitalism. His lack of understanding, and his dislike of the American people, his failure to realize that he will unite the intelligent people of America against him, will cause that nation to fall into disorder. He will expose the character of his cohorts, a stupid, selfish group of morons who have nothing to boast about other than how much money they inherited. I am the man who coached trump to say 'I can grab women by the P##sy because I am rich. Mexicans are rapists. Megyn Kelly is on her period!
I knew Clinton had the intelligent vote, so I counted on the Americans with low IQ's and poor education, and it worked."
One of the Kremlin ministers let out a low whistle, "You are a brilliant man,"
Putin smiled, "That's what he said."